Thursday, June 14, 2012

Emotional Intelligence ~ John J Arent








Last week I wrote a blog on “mental toughness”, please see:


Today, I wanted to focus on the need for “emotional toughness”, which when combined with the “mental’ side of things can help you become a great leader.  There are several definitions of emotional intelligence linked to the individual psychologists who studied this behavior but in essence it is the ability to identify, assess, and control the emotions of oneself, of others, and of groups.  People who have a high degree of emotional intelligence have a much greater opportunity to lead successfully.

Emotional Intelligence can be broken into 3 main components:

  1. Perception of Emotions
  2. Comprehension of Emotions
  3. Management of Emotions



Perception of Emotions ~ is the ability to detect and decode emotions in body language and personal oral communications.  Your talents to empathize is critical in your capacity to perceive accurately. As mentioned numerous time in my blogs, the ability to show true empathy by “walking in their shoes”.  Opening yourself up so you can look at a situation from various angles rather than a myopic point of view.
Your perception is heavily influenced by both your personal body language and the non-verbal cues that your people are sharing.  First, be aware of your message and the way in which you are communicating.  Work on open communications without showing signs that you already have set responses.  The way in which you communicate both orally and by body-signs will help open up true communications and hopefully give a clearer, more accurate picture.

Comprehension of Emotions ~ the interpretation of emotions is the aptitude to understand emotional body language and communications.  Your ability as an executive to be confident without being “block-headed” can have a terrific impact on your leadership ability. Leaders do not have to be perfect…like everyone, they make mistakes.  True leaders have an inner strength and share not only their confidence and strengths but also are open about their weakness.  In essence, they show and are great symbols of humility!
In addition a key trait that leaders have in comprehending emotion is to be able to “control” their own emotions.  An exemplary leader is one which despite major challenges will be able to slow down and monitor their own body language.  They are non-reactive at least in a emotional way!
Lastly, those who have the ability to best understand emotions also have a strong sense of personal accountability. They do not blame others.  They are reflective of outcomes and work on ways to innovate for the future.

Management of Emotions ~ This is a tremendous skill that allows you to be the mediator.  Your tone will dictate the result.  You will have the capability to referee both yourself and your colleagues.  There are not many instances where “shouting” will win in the long term.  You may win some battles but ultimately will lose the war.  When I think of leaders who do well with management of emotions, I immediately think of Ronald Reagan and his accomplishments.  I also was quite impressed with George W. Bush and the emotional intelligence that he showed to the nation shortly after the 9/11 attacks. 
The ability to rally a team after gathering the necessary information is deeply ingrained in those who possess strong management of emotions.  These leaders do not just talk the talk, they actually walk it.  They set the example with their behavior and leadership!


Relationship building is a key to long-term success.  The skill sets needed to build emotional intelligence are able to be learned.  Combining them with mental and physical intelligence is unbeatable!

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